Finally, something different. Yes, yes, yakity yak about the lame green almonds all you want but I’ll be honest, they’re a little gross. Why is it ok to eat a green almond but not veal? Anyway, the cherries have landed. The true symbol of spring. I went through a half flat yesterday like butter in preparation for something new on the menu next week. But what? The Other, Cooler Justin from up in Ojai wants to do a cocktail collab. I have no idea what that entails but it sounds fun.

Who is he? Well, he’s almost exactly my age (a Leo instead of a Virgo), the newly crowned bar manager at The Dutchess, and we share a cool name. We hit it off when we first met up there when I was helping them out with jumpstarting their cocktail program. He’s great. He reached out via the instas and said he wanted to do a collab. Ok, I said. Name your terms. He said, “Mangos and Strega” to which I replied, “We have neither. Let’s wait for cherries.” “Ok,” he said. “Let’s do cherries and rye.”

I can hear Jack Palance’s voice in my head now, “Tango and Cash, Cash and Tango. Cherries and rye, rye and cherries.” They have a long history together. The strange concoction known as “rock and rye” is one of them. A beverage marketed as a cure all in the 19th century. The ability to heal cancer, pneumonia, and consumption touted in their outlandish claims. It’s possible modern medicine’s infusion of cherry flavor into cough syrup spawned from this historic, false elixir.

Who doesn’t remember a childhood with a dripping colander full of freshly washed cherries on the counter? Or going to a restaurant and quaffing your first Shirley Temple? Asking the waiter for more of those radioactive cherries to snack on? Going on a date in college and attempting to tie the stem inside your mouth to prove your cunnilingus prowess?

The cherry doubles as a symbol of luck and prosperity. Don’t believe me? Then why is it one of the most sought after symbols on a classic slot machine? And hey, for you classic video gamer nerds out there, let’s remember the cherry gives invincibility to Pac Man. Yes, most cultures give the cherry beaucoup props as en emblem of prosperity, luck, renewal, rebirth, reincarnation and so on and so forth. The journey to the inner stone regarded in ancient samurai culture as stripping away flesh to reach the soul. Let’s also not forget the term “Popping one’s cherry” not solely reserved for loss of virginity (gross but firmly ingrained within us all) but for any number of rites of passage, anywhere from eating your first oyster to quaffing cerveza numero uno.

So what to do with these damn cherries now that they’re here? Ah, and how do we tinker with them to produce zero waste? Well, number one, save the pits and roast them in the oven. After they cool, crack ’em in the trusty molcajete. This produces a sort of amazing, almond smelling mess which you can soak in high proof hootch for homemade creme de noyaux liquor. Yup, more shit for the booze closet.

We did this, me and Denise. then, I pickled some of them and made “jam” with the rest. My version of jam for these puppies is low heat and a dash of fresh lime juice with equal parts by weight sugar, a vanilla bean, and a few black peppercorns to enhance the cherry flavor. I really enjoy the early season cherries right now as they’re a little tart and not so meaty.

And in the throes of prep came the cocktail idea. Oh yes. I’m not sharing it now but if it works it will be epic.