Here we go again. Some say the hot toddy originated in India in the early 1600s, other sources state it was Edinburgh, Scotland, and then some go back again to India, but with a specific, printed recipe date of 1786. In my own unpolished opinion I think people have always enjoyed themselves a warm bevvy, especially while in the thralls of a headcold replete with insane sinus pressure. Does it help? Who knows? Does it alleviate? Maybe. Alcohol is a vector and usually helps for the moment until it doesn’t. Your doctor won’t prescribe a hot toddy unless he’s been sent to this terrible future from the 1800s when all ailments were fixed with booze. Broken leg? Here’s some rum.

Yes, over my days off I had this awful shit going on with my head and so made myself a hot toddy. I have to say, I experimented a bit and now I’m quite the crackerjack. My recollections of ever having a toddy previously in my life are quite dim and I have to say, they’re quite enjoyable this time of the year and I think I’ll be enjoying a few over the rainy season here in Hell-A.

I knew a guy named Todd once who we all called Toddy. This was back in the Five Spice days. He was a line cook. A red head with long hair and, like me, a penchant for Primus. He had a dog named Jim who he would cook for. All the gristle and meat scraps from the restaurant. On particularly busy nights he would announce, “I’m gonna go get a slice” and he would duck out for a minute to the pizza place next door. His girlfriend was a dominatrix. Yeah, this little shy blonde girl. We all used to get drunk and she would tell us crazy stories and laugh our asses off about it. Todd was a good guy. One of those dudes I lost touch with over the years. It’s been awhile.

Anyway, let’s get into the basics.

The basic hot toddy formula goes like so:

2 oz. Booze (preferably whiskey or whisky)

1 oz. Lemon Juice

.75 oz. Syrup/Honey

Hot Water

Warm Spice Garnish (cinnamon, clove studded lemon wheel, whole star anise)

Most recipes will give you some variation of the above. Some say to use apple cider vinegar. Sounds gross but I have yet to try it myself so I’ll preserve judgment until then.

Here’s my preferred method and specs:

2 oz. Bourbon

.75 oz. Lemon Sherbet

.25 oz. Fresh Lemon Juice

4 Dashes Angostura Bitters

3 oz. Hot Water

Garnish with clove studded lemon wheel and a cinnamon stick.

The difference between this recipe and most here is, the actual method of production. Most online recipes give you the ingredients but they fail to elucidate on the actual “hows” of making the drink. The toddy must be as piping hot as possible, especially when serving in a busy restaurant when you could be in the weeds and put it up only for the servers to ignore it while they’re talking to one another over at the host stand with their backs turned toward you. So, in order to accomplish the hotest possible toddy: 1. Temper your chosen mug/glass with hot water (this means fill the glass with hot water). We use a 10 oz. Irish coffee mug. 2. Fill the larger of your two shaker tins 3/4 full with hot water and then stick your smaller tin inside it. This will heat your ingredients as you add them and ensure the toddy is as hot as it possibly can be. Once you’ve put it all in there, dump out your chosen vessel, then add everything from the small tin and your garnishes.

One more no brainer. Use a see through glass with a handle. Not only does it look nice but most guests have soft ass hands.

Oh wait, another no brainer: The hotter things are, the sweeter they will taste. Yeah. The opposite is also true. This is why you add more sugar to your frozen daiquiri and less to your Irish coffee. Yes, your ice cream tastes sweeter when it’s melted and your cookies, hot out of the oven, taste oh so good…Especially with a glass of cold milk. Anyway…Add less sweet to your hot toddy…

Now that I’ve had a few toddies of my own, I’ve changed the formula around a bit in my head. It should be viewed as an old school cure all and there should be a sort of mixture involved. Can I make it seasonal? Shit fire man, why not? Time will tell.

Here’s my toddy from last night. Note the knives in the background, that’s intentional, my own homage to the kitchen scene in The Shining.

See?

While feeling like complete ass, I had the wherewithal to make a nice ginger tea. Just a shitload of grated ginger, some lemon wheels, and clove heated up then left to sit. I added some honey to a cup, the ginger tea, angostura bitters and some Wild Turkey 101 Rye. Not too shabby. It made me start to think that this, done up with a little more song and dance, could be a banger at the restaurant especially since the weather outside right now is hot garbage.

Here’s what I’m thinking now: The toddy really needs some ginger. Also, the actual water part of it could be replaced with something else to give it more flavor. I mean, 3 oz. of water is too much. So…Why not ginger tea? See? Easy right? And while we’re at it, why not a twinge of black tea to give it even more backbone? Of course, putting tea in a cocktail is always tricky due to the tannins getting out of control. So we’ll do it another way…And we’ve got to make it seasonal while we’re at it…