The Aging Bartender

Bar Hack: Orange Wine Syrup

Let’s be honest here, orange wine is so-so on its own. Luke warm at best. Right down the middle. Only trendy because it’s different and weird. Yeah, I said it, whatever. Cry two tears in a bucket. To be a little more nonpartisan I guess I can say there’s good and bad and mediocre in

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  • Bar Hack: Orange Wine Syrup

    Let’s be honest here, orange wine is so-so on its own. Luke warm at best. Right down the middle. Only trendy because it’s different and weird. Yeah, I said it, whatever. Cry two tears in a bucket. To be a little more nonpartisan I guess I can say there’s good and bad and mediocre in…

  • Never Rub Another Man’s Rhubarb

    I’m pretty sure the cliche of the mid life crisis is just a simple realization that you’re no longer the best version of yourself and when you were, you had no idea and took it all for granted. It has nothing to do with sports cars and chasing young women or men. I think men…

  • Murphy’s Law

    Big shout out and thank you to every single awesome regular who decided to come in last night when I had no barback…Sarcasm aside, it was nice to see everyone, even the guy with the big hair…The real question of the morning is, who is this Murphy guy and why is he always right? A…

  • The Daiquiri is Still the Best

    “I was not proud of what I had learned but I never doubted it was worth knowing.” -Hunter S. Thompson, The Rum Diary At the moment we don’t have a seasonal rum drink on the menu at Rustic. I woke early this morning to this grim, sad, and embarrassing realization. You see, rum is the…

  • Cocktail Progressions

    There’s a pantheon, folks. A “one before the other” type of progression, each riffing on the previous, that stretches out in a timeline into infinity or when it all comes crashing down. Will travelers from other worlds dig through the cold, dark husk of our dead planet when we finally drain it of all resources…

  • Aperol is the New Bartender’s Ketchup

    I’m pretty sure Death & Co. called elderflower liqueur “The Bartender’s Ketchup” in one of their books, possibly The Cocktail Codex (still waiting for the return on that one, Matt). I feel elderflower has faded a bit from the limelight and now Aperol, at least over here on Wilshire Boulevard, seems to go with nearly…

  • New Cocktail: Anything is Fine

    Life lessons. I had to make a return to the Home Depot in Playa del Rey at some point this Sunday so of course it plagued my sleep. I looked online yesterday to see what time they opened. 6:00 a.m. What time did I wake up this morning? 6:00 a.m. Some serious tossing and turning…

  • Rhubarb is a Pain in the Ass (and other life lessons)

    Above you see a mixture of pureed and cooked rhubarb. Mush. It seems through either old age or cockiness or just pure idiocy, I forgot the face of my father and tried to put rhubarb in a blender. I think it’s because I still have PTSD from trying to juice it two years ago. The…

  • New Cocktail: The Corn Identity

    You’re welcome to use the name in your corn cocktails. There’s a bunch of others available too. The Corn Supremacy, The Corn Ultimatum, and The Corn Legacy. In terms of action movies with lots of sequels, the whole Bourne thing got tiring at the end but the original three are pretty damn good. They’re certainly…

  • Farmer’s Market Loot: 7.27.23

    Quick post this morning as shit is real hectic right now. Bunch of stuff, almost too much stuff. Nectarines, apricots, mouse melons, blueberries, and some rhubarb. Most of this is already being used in some form. Well, two out of five. The rhubarb, mini melons, and nectarines not so much. As I tried to prep…

  • The Feces Touch is Strong

    “I’m like King Midas in reverse. Everything I touch turns to shit.” –Tony Soprano Yesterday, I came in from my two days off. Let’s recap. I’m moving to another part of the city, it was my son’s birthday, the restaurant is a little slow, I sent out another book proposal and am waiting to hear…

  • Cocktail of the Week: The Martinez

    We had a couple in last week. The guy (who looked eerily like Samuel Beckett) showed up first…with a Rubik’s Cube that had 36 squares on each side instead of 9. I guess you’d call it a 6x6x6? He placed it on the bar and of course I asked to mess it up to see…