The Aging Bartender

Cocktail Doldrums

The rain and cold weather here has disrupted everything. Up north, where the farms are located, the sheer amount of water and even snow in some places has halted any notion of an early stone fruit season. The farmer’s market has been pretty malaise inducing as well. Bright colored citrus orbs, varieties of cauliflower, and…

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  • Cocktail Doldrums

    The rain and cold weather here has disrupted everything. Up north, where the farms are located, the sheer amount of water and even snow in some places has halted any notion of an early stone fruit season. The farmer’s market has been pretty malaise inducing as well. Bright colored citrus orbs, varieties of cauliflower, and…

  • Not Too Sweet!

    “This cocktail you have here on the menu, it’s not too sweet is it?” This question comes up just as much if not more than, “This dish on the menu, is it good?” Sigh. Yes, it’s my job to be nice in the face of idiocy. My interior monologue segues right into my childhood training,…

  • Bread, Butter, and Honey

    The glories of gluten. Man oh man. I’ll be the first to admit I have a major weakness for it. My childhood diet consisted of gluten with heaping sides of sugar. It’s no wonder I was such a little shit. But alas, in old age, it’s started to wear on me. It’s become more enjoyable…

  • Restaurant Review: Kappo Miyabi

    I’ll be the first one to admit I find Japanese cuisine mystifying and would rather keep it that way. This is a good thing. I know little about it, and there’s so many aspects, nooks, and crannies. Hey, some things in life should remain shrouded in mystery. You can’t know it all. I first tried…

  • Bar Hack: Spicy Phlegethon Bitters

    Lo! Where would Southern California be without the spicy margarita? For those unaware, in other parts of the world, the spicy margarita is both king, queen, and jester here. Yes, it’s a bit basic but also delicious. Salt or no, it matters not. There’s a reason why the classics still have punching power this far…

  • Dry Bartenders?

    It’s happening more and more. Bartenders choosing not to drink in order to live a more healthy lifestyle. It makes sense. I mean, if you look at us a certain way we’re drug dealers. It’s just that our drug of choice is readily available pretty much everywhere, socially acceptable, and dressed up quite nicely for…

  • Bar Hack: Calpico and the Birth of Beelzebubba

    You can’t deny the greats: The White Russian, Egg Nog, Mudslide, Ramos Gin Fizz, Brandy Alexander, oh and let’s not forget clarified milk punch. Yeah, dairy. What is it about dairy that keeps us coming back for more? Where would we be without it? A sad life without cheese and butter. A long list of…

  • My First Real Kitchen: Part Seven

    Finale! That day’s service carved itself into my brain like drunken teenage lovers etching their initials with a pen knife in tree bark, illustrated like the perfect how to manual on self discovery. All of a sudden, I meant something. I had purpose. I could be taken seriously. A possible career on the horizon. Forget…

  • My First Real Kitchen: Part Six

    Still going… I started training with Kevin on the pizza oven after he found a dishwasher. From the get go it was evident he had no idea what he was doing. I got there early, at six, and he had to miss a meeting in order to train me, so right away a huge piece…

  • My First Real Kitchen: Part Five

    Not so cocktail related (maybe more than I think), but I really enjoy writing about all the kitchens I worked in. This is a continuation of part four, from yesterday. After the salami, it became my daily responsibility to slice cheese as well. Big heavy loaves of mozzarella. I always made the slicer immaculate afterwards.…

  • My First Real Kitchen: Part Four

    This is continued from several posts a few weeks back. Here’s parts one, two, and three if you want to catch up. The alarm rang at six thirty and so did the pain in my shoulders. I have no idea how I put my feet on the carpet and walked into the shower but I…

  • Cocktail Names

    Frederick Nietzsche said (I’m paraphrasing major philosophical ideas here) names are all that are real. Once you call a table a chair, it is no longer a table, it is a chair and vice versa. The very act of naming, transforms metaphors into concepts, and if shared within a community, creates the possibility of communication.…